In Pursuit of Normality
by StandbyScripter
Summary: A teenaged Connie returns to Beach City after an absence of almost a year. Season 1 and early season 2 canon compliant. On indefinite hiatus.
1. Chapter 1: Distance

Connie Maheswaran was eighteen years old, but on this day she carried the weight of someone twice that age. It was the first holiday break since she had started university and at any other time she would have been happy to be going home. Now understand that she wasn't exactly unhappy to be going home; it was just that her mind was so plagued with could bes and should haves that thinking of home made her head swim. Just getting into her car had taken hours of pacing in her dorm weighing words upon words on an unseen scale. A trash can full of crumpled paper and an exasperated roommate finally convinced her to settle on sincerity.

And so, as she walked her from her too fancy school to her too fancy car, her actions became more automatic. She thought of nothing but the road, nothing but the calm of day and the quiet of night to guide her. It was only when she passed the sign did her thoughts drift to what transpired a over a year ago in Beach City, Delmarva.

Out of all people, she would never had thought she would be unable to talk to Steven Quartz Universe. As Connie grew from a nervous child to a confident young adult she found it easier to open up and be herself. She could talk to her parents, something she never thought she would be able to really do, and she could talk to people. And to her delight, people talked back. She made friends, lots of friends, but she never let herself forget her first friend. Or at least, she thought she didn't.

Connie would always make time for Steven, talk to Steven, and support Steven. A wan smile crossed her lips momentarily as she drove past half remembered landmarks, the laughter of children and excitement of days long gone flickered through her memories. As she parked her car on the edge of Crystal Temple, she shut her eyes and rested her forehead on the steering wheel. She and Steven had changed so much, they became more and more absorbed in their own worlds as the years went by. She had not been ready then, and she wasn't sure if she was ready now, but she had to try.

She got out, slung her yellow shoulder bag over her neck and took steady steps towards the front door of the house. She didn't need to go far. She noticed something in the corner of her eye, and Connie's breath hitched in her throat.

Though she stood some distance away, she was sure it was him. Several feet away was the form of a young man slumped in a blue beach chair. His head was rolled to to the side, not facing her, and the steady rise and fall of his chest told her he was sleeping. She didn't go any closer, she felt like she didn't have the right to be.

"...Steven?" She said softly.

The man almost immediately got up. He looked in every direction but hers. With newfound confidence she called his name again, a little louder this time. And in that moment, his head jolted in her direction. He lept from his chair, toppling it over in the process. The ground shook as headed for her at full speed. His bare feet kicking up sand in his wake, Connie didn't have the chance to look at him clearly as the glare of the sun shielded his face from her sight. He stopped suddenly, cautiously, and tilted his face downwards to peer at her.

He was still that peachy pink skinned, perpetually chubby Steven she knew. But his short curly black hair had grown into longer locks and his strength was much more noticeable from just looking at him. The bit of fuzz on his chin had grown to a full on goatee and he wore a pale pink tank and faded blue shorts. He towered over her, almost as tall as his late mother but not quite.

At any other time he would have lifted her up and spun her around in a bear hug, smiling wide and chuckling as she laughed in delight. But now, he kept his distance and his expression was uncertain. There was a brief silence, and then:

"I missed you so much!" They both said at once.

They both stumbled back in surprise. Their minds had not been on the same track since the days they became Stevonnie...and that was a long time ago. Connie's blue sun dress fluttered lightly in the breeze as she began to speak.

"Steven...I'm..."

"No," He held up a hand to stop her, and quickly shook his head. "No, I'm sorry. Look, we both...said horrible things that we didn't mean. Well mostly me...but I did start it. I was jealous and selfish. Well, very selfish. Extremely selfish." He sighed, and ran a hand through his hair. "So, please save your sorrys. Save them for someone that deserves them. Just don't save them for me."

Connie took Steven's left hand in her own and slowly rubbed the back of his palm with her thumb. She didn't look at him directly until she decided to speak. "Well Steven even when you...said those things, I still should have been more mature about it. I didn't _have _to say the things I said. " She quirked an eyebrow, her expression still serious but at the same time playful. "So at least let _me _be sorry for that!"

"Okay." He said, grinning sheepishly. "So are we good?" His eyes were searching her face.

"Yeah." Connie looked down at the hand she was holding and clasped it with her own. "We're good."

Their eyes locked as they shared a smile. Hand in hand, the two of them continues down the beach.

"Oh I like your hair!" Steven said suddenly, gesturing with his free hand around Connie's pixie cut. "When did you uh..get it cut?"

Connie blushed. "I'm glad you like it. I cut it off myself the night I left." Connie's mind briefly went back to that night in her room, scissors in hand and eyes rimmed red. "Mom wasn't too happy when she saw it though."

Steven's expression changed briefly as the meaning behind Connie's words sunk in. "But I kept it because I liked it." She added gently. "What about you?" She said, lightly tugging on one of Steven's longer curls and watching it spring back. "You've been growing out your hair I see."

"Yeah, around year ago it starting growing and I just couldn't find the time to cut it." Steven didn't say that he couldn't find the time to do many things after Connie left. "You uh...like it?"

"I love it." Connie reached for his hair, Steven blushed and crouched to let her run a hand through it. "Is hard to manage?"

"Not really, remember when I used to braid your hair?"

"But it's so curly!"

"So was Stevonnie's!"

Connie smiled wide at that. "So," She said. "Where is everyone?"

"I could sense Pearl come close by around the time you got here." He grinned as he sensed Pearl's gem fading into the distance as soon as he said that. "Amethyst and Dad were in Dad's room in the temple sketching ideas for a poster last time I checked. Aaaand Garnet's out managing the other gems."

"Huh. So how are the other gems?"

"Well they're getting along," Steven's grin faded a bit and he glanced as the sky. "...but it's hard sometimes. I was with them all of yesterday and for most of last night. I was tired and needed a break, so I didn't see them today. They still don't seem to understand that I'm human. They say they do...but they really don't."

"They'll get it eventually," Connie smirked and lightly squeezed Steven's hand. "Your gems did."

Steven still seemed to be lost in thought, he seemed to be looking at something Connie couldn't see. When Connie glanced at his face, It suddenly struck her how old he looked. Steven usually had an ever playful, youthful look. When Steven saw her look of concern, he forced a small smile for her.

"Do you want to go inside?" He asked. "I think everyone would like to see you."


	2. Chapter 2: Destiny

It was true that Garnet, Amethyst and Pearl had made the effort to understand Steven's human side. In years since Steven had first moved in with them, their attitudes towards humanity had gone from total apathy to actually making an effort to understand them. They would help fix anything they destroyed during their battles and they were less awkward when interacting with the people of Beach City. He was especially happy to see the changes in Pearl. She had actually come to love the Earth almost as much as his mother, and was much more independent and less likely to cling to Garnet. Amethyst acted less like a teenager and more like a young woman, but still kept her good humored sense of fun. Garnet was more likely to talk and less likely to use force, and she took off her shades when talking to humans to so she would see sincere and less intimidating.

However, out of all the changes he had seen in them, it was how they now treated his father, his human half that had changed the most. As he and Connie entered the beach house, the sight of Greg Universe's utter joy never failed to warm his heart. It was Pearl who had asked him to move in with them one day, to everyone's surprise. When she had suggested adding on to the house, she had used Steven's growing height as an excuse. No one, not even Steven after a while, had ever thought to let Greg move in. It would be too dangerous. The Crystal Gems all had their gems to protect themselves, but Greg was just an ordinary human. On that day Pearl and the rest of the gems promised to protect him with their lives, Pearl had even hugged him. Pearl, who had loved his mother and couldn't understand Rose's love for Greg for the longest time. Greg had been moved to tears.

Greg and Amethyst were sitting on the couch watching some cheesy sitcom from two decades ago when he and Connie entered the Beach house. Pearl was in the kitchen washing dishes and trying hard to look like she had been there the entire time. Greg noticed them first, his wrinkled face spreading in a wide grin when he noticed Connie. He got up, his long silver hair bouncing behind him as he went to embrace her, and Amethyst followed soon after, nearly toppling the taller girl over. Steven watched all this with an amused expression.

"Connie!" Said Amethyst, in a singsong voice."You're looking great! I'm loving' the hair!"

"Thanks Amethyst!" Said Connie, smiling slightly.

"It's so good to see you again!" Said Greg. "How's school been?"

Both Steven and Connie shifted uncomfortably at that, but luckily for them, no one in the room seemed to notice.

"Great, actually! Since I've started reviewing books for the school's student center, I've met so many wonderful new people! How about you?"

Steven didn't hear the rest of the conversation as he quickly became lost in his thoughts. Though he was reluctant to admit it, he was still a little envious of Connie and her new friends. All his human friends had gone off to live their own lives, while Steven was left leading a colony of misfit Gems. He sometimes wondered what it would have been like to leave his small seaside city to go to some college in a far off place as everyone his own age had. Steven sighed, he had thought he had been over this.

"Steven, are you alright?"

Steven's head snapped up as he was suddenly shaken from his thoughts. Pearl, Greg, Amethyst and Connie were now sitting on the couch, all eyes were now on him. He realized that it was Pearl who had spoken.

"Uh...yeah. Sorry," He said. "I just remembered that there was just something I had to do. Connie, do you mind?"

"Oh no, not at all." Said Connie, smiling."I'll see you later, okay?"

He nodded and gave her a halfhearted grin. He turned and walked to the telepad, Amethyst watched him closely as he left.

**o00o**

"I just don't understand why she just doesn't tell them, Garnet!"

A young Steven lay belly up and slumped over the edge of the end of his bed. He was hanging upside down and looking up at his gem guardian with a look of sadness and confusion. Garnet sat next to him at the edge of the bed, legs crossed and hands folded in her lap, her attention fully on the boy.

"Have you asked her why she hasn't told them?" She asked.

"Yeah, she said that her parents would not be ready for something like that." Said Steven, just above the floor his hands balled into fists as his frustration grew. "But they were fine with meeting Alexanderite! I mean, sure they were a little shocked at first, but they accepted it after awhile!"

Garnet turned away from him for a moment, and slowly removed her shades, making them disappear in her right hand. She began to speak, but stopped as her expression went blank for several seconds. She finally turned back to the young boy, picked him up and turned him right side up so he would be sitting next to her.

"Steven, try to see it from her point of view." Garnet said slowly. "Connie's mother is a...doctor...correct? A human healer?"

"Yes?" Said Steven, still not understanding.

"What do you think would happen if would happen if you told Connie's mother that your spit corrected her daughter's eyesight? Something...no doctor has been able to do before?"

"She would be happy?" Suggested Steven.

Garnet waited.

When he saw that that was not the answer she was looking for, Steven's brow furrowed in concentration."She would...wonder how I did it?"

"There would be questions, Steven. Questions that we Gems would not be able to answer. Those questions would then become favors and then suggestions...and then demands."

"...Demands?"

Garnet nodded and got up from the bed. "Follow me," She said, walking towards the warp pad. "You need to see what I mean."

Steven followed her immediately, a nervous aching feeling suddenly tugging at his gut. The two of them warped and suddenly found themselves in the midst of an old and ancient building. It was dark, save area illuminated by the glow of Garnet's gems. The warp pad was surrounded by a ring of dust blown back from their arrival. The area around the warp pad was cracked and worn from years of disuse. Garnet stepped off the pad and walked forward, Steven trailed behind her, careful to stay close so he could see. The two Crystal Gems then continued down what appeared to be a long corridor.

Suddenly, Garnet stopped and pressed her hand into a hand shaped indentation in the wall, and several torches appeared down the hall. They lit up one after the other, "In the early years after the war, your mother would spend much more time with the humans." Said Garnet, her voice echoing in the room. "She did not live with them, but she cared for them from a distance. They loved her, and she loved them in her own way." They passed drawings, crudely etched in stone, of people running towards Steven's mother. Rose Quartz was shown crouching down with her arms outstretched, looking as if she were about to embrace her children.

"They built several monuments in dedication to her, and gave her many gifts in the hope that she would replenish their crops or help with one favor or another. They would do anything to please her." They passed a larger picture, given life with simple color and elegant shapes. Rose was shown from the front, towering over several smaller humans that were reaching up to her. A vast jungle with palmed plants of every size and shape surrounded the people. Rose stood over them with her arms crossed over her chest, and Steven was not sure if she was supposed to look as if she were scolding them...or if she were trying to hug herself.

The hallway became wider and gave way to natural stone of a cave. Steven could see a light at the end of the tunnel. "She gave them everything and then they became accustomed to relying on her." Garnet continued. "They began to act like spoiled children, entitled to her kindness. Our leader decided that enough was enough, and she left those humans to live on their own."

The light was getting closer, Steven felt as though they were walking downward and it was getting hotter.

"After a time, Rose Quartz decided to go back to those people. She felt as if she were too hard on them, but when we returned..."

Garnet and Steven had finally stepped into the light of day. Steven shielded his eyes from the glare of the angry sun, but then his sight finally adjusted to his surroundings and he _saw_.

Before him where there had been a lush jungle in the drawings, there was now the endless dust of desert. He could see the foundations of ancient buildings in the distance, and in the midst of it all was an enormous statue of Rose Quartz, or what once been one. The statue, eerily similar to the one at his mother's healing fountain, was laying on its side with only the head and chest peeking out of the dunes. It looked as if parts it had worn away...or had been smashed. Garnet watched Steven's face closely, sadly.

"...there was nothing left." Garnet finished.

"W-what happened here?" Steven could feel a dull ache in his gem.

"When the humans had tried to grow their own food, they took too much from the land and gave nothing back." Whispered Garnet. "But your mother realized that this," Garnet motioned to the land around them. "was her fault as well. The plants that she had created for the humans for so long had made the land reliant on her magic, and when she left so suddenly, the land died."

Steven's throat tightened and he felt the beginnings of tears forming in his eyes.

Though Garnet had known that this might be an outcome, it still hurt her to see it, to see this again. The memory of Rose Quartz's despair came back to her like a storm. The Gem felt as if she were being torn in two, but an inner embrace calmed her and she continued.

"She decided that the Crystal Gems would no longer interfere with the humans. We would defend their world from our mistakes, but they would need to learn to survive on their own." Garnet crouched down to Steven's level, put both hands on his shoulders and looked him straight in the eyes. "Steven, this is why you can never tell Connie's parents about your powers."

Steven thought about how Connie would sometimes talk to him about her mother, how her mother would sometimes come home upset about something and be unable to talk to her about it. He thought about how Connie would sometimes tell him about her history class, and how he had been so shocked and confused to hear how different it was from what the gems had told him about the world. He thought about the glimpses he would get of the news on TV before one of the gems or his dad changed the channel or blocked it off entirely. Steven thought about all those things, and then he finally understood.

"But..." Said Steven, his face now wet with tears. His brows furrowed as he spoke again. "The people of this world should believe in us. We should still at least try to...I mean with the things they can't do..with the things they can't change.." Steven said this in his normal, even voice, but to Garnet, it was a harsh and ugly sound.

"I know you want to help them, you are so much like your mother in that respect." Said Garnet. "But it is your duty as a Crystal Gem to-"

"_But I am not my mom!_" Steven was looking up at Garnet again, his pupils shrunken in sudden fury. He shrugged off her hold on him and faced her with his back straight, hands balled into fists at his sides. "And I am _not_ just a gem, I am _human_ too!"

"Ste-"

"Does this mean if I were only..if I were only human, you wouldn't care about me?!"

"Of course not!" Garnet's face was now flushed with color. She got up, briefly closed her eyes and sighed. "Steven," She said more sternly. "Even if we did as you said, we would somehow have to balance that with stopping corrupted gems and holding off the homeworld!"

"W-what about when there..there are no more gem monsters or mean gems to fight, Garnet?"

Garnet's mouth hung open for a moment, before she spoke. "I think there will always be some gem to fight...just like there will always be evil in this world. And all I-" Garnet quickly caught herself. "All _we_ can do is fight them." She said softly.

Steven turned his head away from her and stared at the ground. Garnet crouched down again. "Steven, look at me..._please_."

After a moment, Steven looked at her, his eyes red and raw and his expression calm but utterly miserable. Garnet wiped away his tears with the back of her fingers.

"Pearl, Amethyst, and I may not be able to change the world like you want us to, but that does not mean that _you_ can't."

Steven's eyes went wide. "What can _I_ do? I'm..I'm not strong, or fast or...anything like you Amethyst or Pearl!"

"You are strong, Steven, and you are getting stronger everyday. Not just physically, but emotionally as well."

"But what could I do..." Steven briefly glanced past Garnet to the fallen statue of Rose Quartz. "...that won't cause...all of _this_?"

"You need to think of every action you take carefully. Big changes don't happen right away...they take...time. If you want to change the world, you need to start small. I am not going to lie to you, you will make mistakes sometimes, but I believe you can do it. I _know_ that you can change the world for the better."

Steven looked up at Garnet, and the child gave her a hopeful look.

**o00o**

Eight years later, that same child, now a young man, stood on the center of the platform in his mother's secret armory. He was deep in thought and didn't seem to notice anything around him but the 16 suits of the Armor of the Fallen. A lion, his lion, came from seemingly out of nowhere. The pink feline rubbed his head against Steven's side, much like a cat would to get his attention. Steven turned and pet Lion's mane affectionately and the two of them sat down in front of the armory's pedestal.

"Oh Lion," He said, resting the back of his head against the pedestal so he was looking up at the cavern's ceiling. "What am I going to do?"

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Sorry for the wait. I know this chapter was kind of heavy, but the next chapter will be a bit more lighthearted. Connie didn't exactly leave _yet_...**


End file.
